Self Esteem And Self Confidence

By Frank D. Sallee


People who have self-confidence believe in themselves and feel that they are capable of achieving what they want in life, or dealing with any situation that they may have to face. They have an aura of self-confidence and self-assurance, which is apparent to others. People like to spend time with them; they feel comfortable and secure in their presence.In contrast, there are many people who are reasonably talented, but who lack self-confidence. These people are victims of the several myths that surround self-confidence.

Having lived without a lot of Self-Confidence in my younger years, I can tell you - Life is MUCH better with it. Self-Confidence opens doors. It allows you to live fully, to get in the game, to play full out. With Self-Confidence, you apply for the promotion, start the business, say YES to opportunities. With Self-Confidence, life is richer and fuller and a whole lot more FUN!

Self-Confidence starts with seeing something you want to do and giving it a try. Michael Jordan wasn't born knowing how to play basketball, but he had a desire to play and it turned out he was pretty good at it. Lance Armstrong wasn't born with the skill and endurance to win the Tour de France seven consecutive times, but he got on the bike and built confidence along the way. Self-Confidence is a quality we all possess - a quality we can develop from the inside out.

I must admit that I was one of those people who firmly believed that one gets born with confidence. I mean, have you ever seen someone who is really self confident and truly self assured. They just seem so in control and so alive; as if nothing can stop them. Is this a 'given' or is it something you learn? The truth is that either way, we all want it and you probably can't ever have enough of it. Only after investing in a good self confidence program did my perception of self confidence start to change - and thankfully so.Self confidence is nothing but a state of mind. It's an attitude and something that can be learned. Think about it - when you actually feel self confident it's only a feeling isn't it? It does not rely on anything outside yourself, but relies solely on the process of though and on how you organize ideas and response in your mind.

To be a confident person, ACT like a confident person. Think of someone who appears to be brimming with confidence and BE like them.Ask yourself: "What can I do to feel more confident?" Choose one thing you can do today to increase your feelings of Self-Confidence and do it. Take the first step. "A journey of 1000 miles..."Look your best - even if you work at home, even if you're a stay-at-home mom, even if there doesn't appear to be any real reason to care about your appearance. It's a way to respect yourself and you'll be ready to answer the door when opportunity knocks.

Such people should look at children. Children believe in themselves, and this gives them the self-confidence to try to do things they have never done before, be it learning how to cycle or how to swim.In fact, no child comes into the world knowing all the skills. But it does not take long to teach children most of the basic skills. Then, why should it be difficult for adults to learn new skills or brave new challenges?Another myth is that only self-confident people can afford to take risks. This again is not true. In fact, self-confident people are more realistic about their capabilities. They know what they can do, and what they can't do. More importantly, they know how to deal with failures.

In contrast, people who lack self-confidence are afraid of failure. This fear prevents them from taking on new tasks. They constantly pine for the approval of others, and when they don't get it they end up losing their self-confidence.What is apparent is the lack of understanding. People must realize that self-confidence is a state of mind. It is not dependent upon a person's beauty or looks. It flows from a person's self-belief, and this belief can be built.All that a person needs to do is to debunk myths that self- confidence cannot be acquired or that self-confidence is a byproduct of exceptional knowledge, skills and luck. Once they do so, they will find it easier to acquire the same magnetic powers that self-confident people have.




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