Even if you find it very difficult to make conversation with a woman you like, you can find a way to get better at it and to feel a lot more comfortable talking to a woman you are attracted to. Far too often, guys will allow the fact that they feel awkward talking to a woman keep them from approaching women that they would like to be able to get to know better or take out on a date. You don't want to have to go through that, because you know that if you don't find a way to have an easy time talking to women, the dating game is always going to seem hard to you and it really doesn't have to be that way at all.
The moment that you begin to think of her as being someone you really want to get with, you are going to feel a lot of pressure that just doesn't have to be there. If you can trick your mind into feeling like you really don't feel that attracted to her, you'll feel a ton of that pressure come off and that alone can make it seem a lot easier to talk to a woman.
I'd finally get past my approach anxiety and start talking with a woman. - "Hey, my name is Carlos..." And after I got the conversation started - WHAM. I'd get nervous when I couldn't remember any of the stuff I'd memorized. - Do I say that thing about "who lies more"? Or do I tease her? What was that great teasing line I thought of the other day...? I mean, I thought I knew it cold when I left the house, but between then and now I totally lost it. And I'd stand there like a deer in the headlights, no idea what to say to her.How to talk to women You thought you were all prepared after reading all my cool advice and tips, but now you're sitting in that uncomfortable silence while she stares at you, waiting for SOMETHING to come out of your mouth.
Showing her that you have some shared interests is one of the BEST ways to get her feeling like she wants to exchange phone numbers or spend time with you later. If she feels that you and her have some things in common, that becomes something that you can talk about that leads to her wanting to spend time with you. So, find some of those common interests as quickly as you can.Angelica was a gorgeous 24 year old graduate student who had asked me this question: "Why don't men know how to talk to women?"
You see, I found out that just sitting at home on my couch reading this stuff on my computer wasn't enough. I had to practice some of the things out loud. But even that was not enough, so I tried something a little different and off the wall. And it worked like a champ!I'm assuming that you've walked up and said "Hi" or some other opener to get the conversation started. I've taught you plenty of methods in these newsletters,and, as you know, it's not what you open with that's important, but what you say NEXT that will make the difference.
Body language is something that we don't really put too much thought into most of the time. It's something that we just subconsciously do, the way that we stand or the way that we hold ourselves. Yet, that is another way that you can either send out a good vibe or a bad vibe. Let me tell you, most men send out bad vibes just from their body language.
If you want to learn how to talk to women then you should pay very close attention to the conversation I just had with Angelica. She gave us all real insight into what women are looking for when men walk up to them. But there's also a lot she left out and I'm going to fill in some of that gap. Most attractive women are attention seekers.
They seek validation, some seek to have their egos strokes, and some of them actually want to genuinely someone that they feel they can connect with. It's far easier than you think, but first you have to unlearn what you have learned (I think I heard that in some movie somewhere).
How to speak with women I would cram all my notes on a piece of paper with facts, writing stuff everywhere, and in every direction. On the margins, sideways, whatever. Then, when it came time to study for a test on dates and names and memorized facts, I would just sit down with the page and cover up sections with my hand and try to recall the information.Well, we all did this in some way or another with our notes. What you don't realize is that you weren't learning the information as much as you were learning WHERE that information was on the paper. You got locked into recalling the information based on WHERE it was, not WHAT it was. So when you get a fact or information that you can't see on a piece of paper, you would forget it fast. (Which it's so easy to forget names. We're not paying attention to it enough the first time, and there's nothing to anchor it in our heads.)
If you walked up to a little kid and started talking to them would you be thinking any of these things? What about walking up to a friend? What about walking up to a 70 year old women? In your mind you view these things a harmless. You view them as having equal or less social value than you do, so it's far easier to approach them and start a conversation. Yet, if you see a very good-looking woman, your tongue gets tied up and your mind begins playing tricks on you.
Now you have to practice recalling these things in MANY different locations, and in many different situations. You would want to do stuff like:But if you REALLY want to improve by leaps and bounds in your inner and outer game of conversation, here's a KILLER bonus technique:Put a bluetooth headset on (or any cell phone earpiece so it looks like you're talking on your phone). Then, go out and recite what it is you're memorizing when you're out in public on a city street or in a store. Don't worry, other people will just assume you're talking to someone on your cell phone. But this method will help you get over your fear of looking foolish in front of other people. AND it gives you a killer rehearsal for saying it in front of a woman. You get your shyness out of the way, and you build confidence in the process.
When a conversation is too boring or too mundane, there is little chance that you are really going to be able to spark some attraction, which is necessary if you are going to be able to get a date with her. Being able to take the conversation in a direction so that it becomes flirtatious is something that you need to be able to do. If you can't flirt, then you have to learn how to because flirting is a necessary skill that you need to have when you make conversation with a woman.
The moment that you begin to think of her as being someone you really want to get with, you are going to feel a lot of pressure that just doesn't have to be there. If you can trick your mind into feeling like you really don't feel that attracted to her, you'll feel a ton of that pressure come off and that alone can make it seem a lot easier to talk to a woman.
I'd finally get past my approach anxiety and start talking with a woman. - "Hey, my name is Carlos..." And after I got the conversation started - WHAM. I'd get nervous when I couldn't remember any of the stuff I'd memorized. - Do I say that thing about "who lies more"? Or do I tease her? What was that great teasing line I thought of the other day...? I mean, I thought I knew it cold when I left the house, but between then and now I totally lost it. And I'd stand there like a deer in the headlights, no idea what to say to her.How to talk to women You thought you were all prepared after reading all my cool advice and tips, but now you're sitting in that uncomfortable silence while she stares at you, waiting for SOMETHING to come out of your mouth.
Showing her that you have some shared interests is one of the BEST ways to get her feeling like she wants to exchange phone numbers or spend time with you later. If she feels that you and her have some things in common, that becomes something that you can talk about that leads to her wanting to spend time with you. So, find some of those common interests as quickly as you can.Angelica was a gorgeous 24 year old graduate student who had asked me this question: "Why don't men know how to talk to women?"
You see, I found out that just sitting at home on my couch reading this stuff on my computer wasn't enough. I had to practice some of the things out loud. But even that was not enough, so I tried something a little different and off the wall. And it worked like a champ!I'm assuming that you've walked up and said "Hi" or some other opener to get the conversation started. I've taught you plenty of methods in these newsletters,and, as you know, it's not what you open with that's important, but what you say NEXT that will make the difference.
Body language is something that we don't really put too much thought into most of the time. It's something that we just subconsciously do, the way that we stand or the way that we hold ourselves. Yet, that is another way that you can either send out a good vibe or a bad vibe. Let me tell you, most men send out bad vibes just from their body language.
If you want to learn how to talk to women then you should pay very close attention to the conversation I just had with Angelica. She gave us all real insight into what women are looking for when men walk up to them. But there's also a lot she left out and I'm going to fill in some of that gap. Most attractive women are attention seekers.
They seek validation, some seek to have their egos strokes, and some of them actually want to genuinely someone that they feel they can connect with. It's far easier than you think, but first you have to unlearn what you have learned (I think I heard that in some movie somewhere).
How to speak with women I would cram all my notes on a piece of paper with facts, writing stuff everywhere, and in every direction. On the margins, sideways, whatever. Then, when it came time to study for a test on dates and names and memorized facts, I would just sit down with the page and cover up sections with my hand and try to recall the information.Well, we all did this in some way or another with our notes. What you don't realize is that you weren't learning the information as much as you were learning WHERE that information was on the paper. You got locked into recalling the information based on WHERE it was, not WHAT it was. So when you get a fact or information that you can't see on a piece of paper, you would forget it fast. (Which it's so easy to forget names. We're not paying attention to it enough the first time, and there's nothing to anchor it in our heads.)
If you walked up to a little kid and started talking to them would you be thinking any of these things? What about walking up to a friend? What about walking up to a 70 year old women? In your mind you view these things a harmless. You view them as having equal or less social value than you do, so it's far easier to approach them and start a conversation. Yet, if you see a very good-looking woman, your tongue gets tied up and your mind begins playing tricks on you.
Now you have to practice recalling these things in MANY different locations, and in many different situations. You would want to do stuff like:But if you REALLY want to improve by leaps and bounds in your inner and outer game of conversation, here's a KILLER bonus technique:Put a bluetooth headset on (or any cell phone earpiece so it looks like you're talking on your phone). Then, go out and recite what it is you're memorizing when you're out in public on a city street or in a store. Don't worry, other people will just assume you're talking to someone on your cell phone. But this method will help you get over your fear of looking foolish in front of other people. AND it gives you a killer rehearsal for saying it in front of a woman. You get your shyness out of the way, and you build confidence in the process.
When a conversation is too boring or too mundane, there is little chance that you are really going to be able to spark some attraction, which is necessary if you are going to be able to get a date with her. Being able to take the conversation in a direction so that it becomes flirtatious is something that you need to be able to do. If you can't flirt, then you have to learn how to because flirting is a necessary skill that you need to have when you make conversation with a woman.
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