Co-parenting after a split is never easy and more so in the event that there is contentious relationship with the other partner. There might be concerns as concerns ability of a partner to effectively take care of the kids or there may be stress that is caused by child support issues. When co-parenting is well done, it works well and kids will enjoy stability and peace of mind. They will have close relationship with both parents. In considering co parenting Orange County CA residents will benefit from various tips.
Empathy of one of the most important virtues that will help. This involves having both parents put themselves in the position of their children even as they raise them together while living differently. When a child misses the other parent, they should be allowed to freely air their minds. A parent may rebuke such a child without knowing the effect will be more harmful.
Parents should be very flexible and open as regards schedules. Kids will be adversely affected when parents start arguing before them concerning visitation schedules. It is true that in some cases there may be visitation schedules that are ordered by court but this does not mean that one must follow it without any bit of flexibility. Understanding between both parents comes very much in handy. This when coupled with flexibility ensures there will be no squabble regarding visitation.
Proper communication with the co parent will be crucial. Peaceful, purposeful and consistent communication with the ex will help the kids. This should be done even when it seems impossible. The communication is mostly as regards the well-being of the kids. Before contacting each other, it is important to consider the way that talk will affect the kids. The children should be the focal point of the communication. It is never absolutely necessary to meet in person, which is where the communication comes in.
There needs to be teamwork when co-parenting because there are numerous decisions that need to be made together. This is irrespective of whether you like each other or not. There needs to be cooperation without overreaction as it makes decision making very simple. Children are supposed to have exposure to various perspectives as they learn to be flexible too. Children also need to live under similar expectations in whichever of the homes. This prevents them from getting confused.
In regard to discipline, parents should have same systems and consequences when rules are broken. This must always be the case even when the infraction happens in the other house. If for instance the kids have TV privileges when they are with your ex, the same should happen in your house. Rewards for good behaviour must also be similar.
The resolution of disagreement is key to peaceful and constructive upbringing of children in such a set up. As much as possible, parents need to solve any arising disagreements respectfully. Children should not be sucked into such. It is important to involve each other in all decisions to avoid disagreements.
For peaceful and effective co-parenting, compromise will play a major role. Sacrifices should come from both partners for the sake of children. Compromise should not feel like one is lesser or disrespected.
Empathy of one of the most important virtues that will help. This involves having both parents put themselves in the position of their children even as they raise them together while living differently. When a child misses the other parent, they should be allowed to freely air their minds. A parent may rebuke such a child without knowing the effect will be more harmful.
Parents should be very flexible and open as regards schedules. Kids will be adversely affected when parents start arguing before them concerning visitation schedules. It is true that in some cases there may be visitation schedules that are ordered by court but this does not mean that one must follow it without any bit of flexibility. Understanding between both parents comes very much in handy. This when coupled with flexibility ensures there will be no squabble regarding visitation.
Proper communication with the co parent will be crucial. Peaceful, purposeful and consistent communication with the ex will help the kids. This should be done even when it seems impossible. The communication is mostly as regards the well-being of the kids. Before contacting each other, it is important to consider the way that talk will affect the kids. The children should be the focal point of the communication. It is never absolutely necessary to meet in person, which is where the communication comes in.
There needs to be teamwork when co-parenting because there are numerous decisions that need to be made together. This is irrespective of whether you like each other or not. There needs to be cooperation without overreaction as it makes decision making very simple. Children are supposed to have exposure to various perspectives as they learn to be flexible too. Children also need to live under similar expectations in whichever of the homes. This prevents them from getting confused.
In regard to discipline, parents should have same systems and consequences when rules are broken. This must always be the case even when the infraction happens in the other house. If for instance the kids have TV privileges when they are with your ex, the same should happen in your house. Rewards for good behaviour must also be similar.
The resolution of disagreement is key to peaceful and constructive upbringing of children in such a set up. As much as possible, parents need to solve any arising disagreements respectfully. Children should not be sucked into such. It is important to involve each other in all decisions to avoid disagreements.
For peaceful and effective co-parenting, compromise will play a major role. Sacrifices should come from both partners for the sake of children. Compromise should not feel like one is lesser or disrespected.
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