Reasons Why People Choose To Attend Couples Counseling

By Pat Skeats


Relationship counseling is a process by which the parties in a relationship seek outside help in order to recognize and manage problems within the relationship. Every marriage experiences troubles at some time for a variety of reasons. Many people choose to go to couples counseling in order to prevent the marriage from breaking down.

This is also known as relationship therapy. It may be either short term, lasting between one to three sessions, or it may be long term, lasting for several months or even years. The length of time varies for each couple, depending on different factors such as how much progress is being made and whether they can afford to continue the sessions.

One solution that is used to repair the relationship is to try and change the perceptions and emotions of the individuals. This means getting them to look at or respond differently to situations and how they feel about them. Our perceptions and emotional responses in a relationship are often contained in what some psychologists call a love map. The emotions in a love map can be explored together and discussed openly with our partner. The core values in a love map can be understood and respected by our partner or we can change them when they are no longer appropriate.

Many psychologists believe that instead of learning how to argue better and analyze past mistakes, it is more productive for both people to recognize and admit that they are emotionally attached to their partner and dependent on them the same way that a child is dependent on a parent. The basis of this dependence is a need for nurturing protection from another person.

A licensed relationship therapist may rely on psychiatrists, social workers and pastoral counsellors for help in treating married people. The duty of a relationship therapist is to listen to and respect their clients. The therapist must understand them and seek to facilitate a better functioning relationship between the partners. They must provide confidential dialogue which is sensitive to the feelings of each person. They should enable each individual to be heard and speak about their feelings.

These types of services are also operated by universities and colleges, normally on a pro bono basis. Therapy centers are often staffed by student volunteers, led by a member of the college faculty. Many larger companies also have a full-time professional therapist on staff to assist employees who are experiencing personal problems.

The basic job of a therapist includes identifying any repetitive, negative cycles of behavior in the relationship. They must strive to understand what the source of the negative emotions is that consistently shows up. Ultimately, the therapist should seek to foster a secure attachment between the individuals to help maintain intimacy in the relationship. Some of the core principles of relationship therapy are respect and empathy for each person and tactful behavior at all times.

Some therapists are increasingly using modern technologies like voip conferencing to interact with clients. This is becoming popular because of the added accessibility that it gives to busy clients, as well as breaking down any geographic barriers if one partner is in a different city or town. However, there are concerns regarding the privacy levels of these new technologies, despite their convenience. Many clients and therapists still prefer the comfort of having in-person sessions.




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